15 December 2014

“Queen/Mother”


It was going to be the best birthday ever, my 17th birthday party was a group of my friends and I going to see the infamous British rock band “Queen” at The Chicago Stadium on Thursday, the 7th of December…my actual birthday! For those of you who are my vintage, you’ll remember that Queen was reaching their peak in 1978…They had a string of hits, including the iconic “Bohemian Rhapsody” and the New Youth Anthem, “We Will Rock You/We Are The Champions” and Freddie Mercury, Brian May, Roger Taylor and John Deacon were all in prime shape and flawless performance! My childhood friend Todd and our friend Gino waited outside The Flipside Record store all night several months back and we bought a block of 10 tickets…costing us almost a $100, which was BIG MONEY to a couple of 16 year olds in 1978! The plan had been, all along, to celebrate my 17th birthday at this concert, it was significant because I was the first one in our group of friends, as well as in the garage band we had, to suggest that Queen was and will continue to be a Great Rock and Roll Band…despite the fruity lead singer, he was immensely talented as was the rest of band…I would debate endlessly about how “News of The World”, the hit album that summer, was good…the real gems are in the first 2 albums. I won the argument and this was my way of celebrating the event!


When that first week of December in ’78 came around, the frenzy of anticipation had reached epic proportions. We were stoked, we were set and ready to go…there was going to be 10 of us all together; the four guys in the band (Todd, Gino, the drummer boy, Scotty and me) plus both my girlfriend at the time (Stephanie) and Todd’s girlfriend (Amy). My younger brother was going, so was a friend of the band named Dave and his younger brother (Doug) and Dave’s girlfriend (Karen). The plan was that Dave, who was a couple years older than us (he was 18) was going to borrow his parent’s van and we’d all ride together. We had it all worked out, we had scored some California weed (not easy in 1978 suburbia), we had a couple bottle of wine set aside and we were going to head to the Chicago Stadium right after school, sometime around 4:20 in the afternoon…but, as I was learning, the best laid plans of mice and men often go astray and so it was the lesson on my 17th birthday; shit went wrong!




That's Todd and me, circa 1978...

I woke up on my birthday with the joy of hearing that due to a snow storm, school was cancelled both Thursday and Friday…sweet, I thought, what a perfect birthday present from Mother Nature! I spend the early part of that listening to loud Queen music, getting psyched up for the show that night and around noon Todd came over (he lived next door) and we went to my basement studio, got stoned and taught ourselves “You’re My Best Friend…” (from Queen’s iconic 4th album, “A Night at The Opera”). It was all good, we gave Gino a call to confirm plans, we contacted our girlfriends to get them to come over as soon as possible. By mid-afternoon everybody had gathered at my mother’s house, Dave was at work until about 4, but then he and others were coming to pick the rest of us up and off we’d go…to see Queen! Dave’s brother Doug called us about the time my mother got home from work with some very disappointing news, news about tragedy narrowly averted, but when Dave went to pick up his girlfriend, there was an accident and Dave totaled the van!
               “Are they alright?” I asked Doug as everyone gathered around me, “Are they hurt?”
               “Dave’s in the hospital with some cuts and bruises, he has a broken leg but he’s okay, Karen is fine.” Doug sighed heavy, “This really messes up the birthday plan, I’m sorry!”
               “Man, that’s alright…at least Dave and Karen are alright.” I looked at everyone, all five of them looking back at me, silent, pen jaw, waiting, hanging on every word, “We’ll still go to the show. Do you still want to go Doug?”
               “I don’t think my parents will let me, not without Dave…” Doug sighed, he did that a lot, like Eyore in Winnie the Pooh, Doug was a sighing kind of kid, “How can you still go?”
               “We’re going…” I nodded and grinned, not having a clue how we’d do this but very confident that it would indeed happen, we were going to this concert. I concluded the conversation with Doug quickly, “Okay Doug, well I’m sorry about this…We’re all glad Dave and Karen are okay, shit happens man, that’s all…it’s all going to be alright.” I hung up the phone and everyone was still looking at me, still silently waiting for this plan that I didn’t have, but I started to think out loud, “The show starts at 8, right?”
               “Yes.” Stephanie, my girlfriend that month, pulled the 10 tickets out of the envelop, “The show starts at 8 and it’s at 1800 West Madison Avenue, in Chicago.”
               “What time is it now?” I asked my brother, “Is mom home yet?”
               “It’s about 4:30…” my brother answered and added, “Mom will be home in about a half hour.”
               “What about the train?” Todd suggested, “We could take taxi cabs…”
               “That’s going to cost a shit load…” Gino shook his head, “I could ask my sister?”
               “Both of those are good ideas…” I said, “Let’s get on this, alright? Todd, you and Brian try to figure out the train schedule, maybe the taxi fare…Gino, could you call Donna, see if she has plans?”
               “Yeah, but she can only take about half of us…” Gino looked at the girlfriends like they were expendable, “Not everyone will fit in my sister’s car.”
               “Well, just call her and see, okay?” I turned to the girlfriends, “My mom’s going to be home soon, will you guys help me clean the house up and then when my mom gets here, keep everyone cool in the studio, okay?”
               “Okay!” Stephanie and Amy said in stereo. I took them upstairs and for the next 20 minutes there was a flurry of activities as we cleaned up from being around the house all day and tried to find a way to this show. “If Gino’s sister can take you guys…” Amy said to me while we finished in the kitchen, “I’m okay with not going…it’s your birthday, you’ve been waiting all year for this, you and Todd have to go, you just learned Best Friend!” Amy was such a nice girl, so unlike my girlfriend of the month, who replied, in a very bitchy tone, “Fuck that, I want to go the fucking show too!”
               “We’re all going to go, don’t worry…” no sooner had I said that when I heard the garage door opening and mom was pulling her little brand new 1978 Buick Skylark in from the storm. This was a new car, mom bought it for herself as an early birthday present the month before, it was a sporty little ride and she really loved it because it was the first decent car she’d had in years. I cued the girlfriends to round everyone up in the basement and keep them cool, “I’m going to talk to my mom for a few minutes and then I’ll let you guys know the plan from there on out…alright?”
               “Alright!” they again said in stereo, “Cool!”
               “Hey honey…” mom smiled and kissed my cheek as I held the kitchen door open for her, “How’s my birthday boy doing?”
               “I’m okay…” I smiled weakly, then admitted, “But I got troubles…actually, I don’t, Dave does…he got into an accident in his parents van. He’s hurt, but he’ll be alright…but…”
               “But you can’t get to the concert, can you?” mom sat down and lit a cigarette as I poured her a glass of scotch on the rocks, as was her daily custom, “Where is it?”
               “Chicago Stadium.” I started to explain, “Todd is looking into the train, but the station is far from the stadium…”
               “Oh no god damn way!” mom stopped me, “That’s a really bad area, it’s way too rough to take a taxi and what about after the show? No, uh-un, you’re not taking a train to Chicago!”
               “Well Gino called his sister, but her car is too small for everyone…” I said and then, “Unless I can use your car too, maybe…please?”
               “My new car?” mom made a definite face that said fuck that but she said, “No, I’ll take you.”
               “Mom, your car is a sports car, we can sit maybe five or six of us at most…” I said, but then thought again, “…but if Donna could take a few people in her car…maybe, really?”
               “Yeah, I’ll drop you guys off…” mom took a stiff drag from her cigarette, “go hang out for a while and pick you up after the show.”
               “You could go to the show!” I smiled, thinking how we had three extra tickets because Dave, Doug and Karen couldn’t go…Donna could have one, mom could have one and we could sell one, “We have three extra…do you want to see Queen? Do you like Queen?”
               “Okay, I like Queen…” mom grinned, “Who are they?”





This is my mother's 1978 Buick Skylark we went in...

It was close to 6 when things finally got rolling and we were ready to head down to the city, but then, just because shit happens, as we waited for Gino’s sister to come over, there was another phone call; Donna had been rear-ended on her way over to our house and her car was not drivable! SHIT! I remember feeling like I was going to both cry and explode but mom, being the hero she always is, made a radically silly suggestion; we can all fit into her little Buick Skylark! I disagreed, everybody was laughing but mom continued to explain her plan by drawing it out on a scrap of paper. There were 8 of us now, only 2 people could fit into the seats in front, but if she put the back seats down so it makes a station wagon environment, we could stack up everyone in the back. Mom drew on the paper a box, explaining how Gino, Todd and my brother could lay down first, then Amy and Stephanie laid down on top of them, then Donna on top of them, I ride shot gun (because it was my birthday) and mom was driving. Everyone laughed and chuckled, but we all agreed, at this point, it was our only option. In less than 15 minutes we had everyone stacked inside the back of the tiny bubble like car and we went to pick up Donna. The driving was difficult because of the storm, but the roads were clear and with the extra weight in the tiny car, it held the road but was difficult to manage for my mom. We switched drivers, I got behind the wheel after we picked Donna up and then without further delay, we were at last on our way to Chicago to see Queen!



In 1978 we lived in a little suburb about 45 minutes from downtown Chicago and typically it was less than an hour ride on the expressway. That night, because of the storm, it took considerably longer. I was only 16, but I had been stealing and driving my mother’s car since I was 14 years old so I wasn’t intimidated by the grueling driving conditions. In fact, I was much more concerned about the comfort and well being of all my passengers. My mother worried out loud about the safety dangers and kept warning me every time we saw any kind of car that looked like a cop car. The trip took us almost 2 hours and although we made it to the stadium before show time, we dropped everyone off at the front gate. Mom suggested I go with the kids, give her a ticket and she will park the car to meet us inside and Donna volunteered to keep mom company so I gave them the tickets while the rest of us headed into the large, cavern sized arena with excitement and glee! Stopping to buy concert t-shirts, program guides, drinks and munchies, we headed up to our seats, getting there moments before the house lights went dark. Todd fired up one fat joint and I fired up another and we smoked them madly, before the show started, before mom and Donna got there, we got baked! I couldn’t believe it, I was so excited and amazed at how well everything came together.




This is my ticket stub from the show...

We were just finishing the joints when the lights went dark, the crowd roared as we rose to our feet, peering over the heads of those in front of us, trying to get a glimpse of the band, we had great seats but with everyone standing, it was still hard to see the stage. Then, we heard it…that familiar, hypnotic beat of The New Youth Anthem…buda-bump! Bada-bump! ”We Will, We Will, Rock You!” and for the next 2 hours or so, we were zoomed through an extraordinary show. The stage was very dramatic, large steps and platforms that light up, platforms that lift and move, incredible performances…Freddie was on fire, without a doubt one of the greatest (if not THE greatest) Rock and Roll strutters…he put anyone I’d ever seen before to shame…including Jagger, Bowie, Morrison or anyone…Freddie Mercury was incredible to watch. He had a way of making you look at him, making you feel his performance in a way nobody I’d seen before could do…and he wasn’t the only one in the band who impressed me. Brian May, when he was lifted high above the audience, ripping into his hand made guitar like the new Hendrix, his mane of curly hair bobbing in the shadows of the multi-colored spot lights…it was inspiring. It’s well known how much I Love The Beatles, how I have been a part of The Grateful Dead community and I have the unique experience of having seen just about every single major rock and roll band between 1970 and 1990…but the experience of seeing Queen perform live on my 17th birthday is most certainly in the top five rock and roll shows of my entire life!



This was about our sitting area...close, but still...

After the show, we finally found mom and Donna, they had never made it to our seats and instead sat inside a bar, watching the entire show with a group of stadium employees. They found us wandering around the lobby, both of them were very drunk and neither of them could remember where exactly they parked the car. It didn’t matter, we were all really high, some from the weed but for me, it was all about the show, all about the performance and music. The girlfriends, along with Donna and my little brother waited in the stadium while mom, Todd, Gino and I went scouting for the car parked in a very dark and large, snow swept parking lot. I found the car, I had the keys so I started it up and started honking the horn. Gino and Mom found me while I was waiting for the car to warm and we found Todd as we drove towards the stadium. When we got to the others, they were standing outside, huddled against the wind together. Everybody again climbed into the back, stacking up one upon each other just like before; mom was way too drunk to drive and so I again took the wheel. There was a lot less traffic going home, but the weather was worse so it took us about as long, although the last 20 minutes were almost unbearable. Donna, who had been drinking with mom all night, got very ill and since she was on top in the people pile in back, when she puked, everybody got some of it…and then, because it grossed her out so much, Stephanie also puked on Todd’s head! Everybody was shouting and moaning, shifting and moving, yelling for me to pull over but mom said no, it’s too dangerous. I kept driving, heading for Gino and Donna’s house first, but it couldn’t be fast enough! Once we got everyone home, when we got home and it was just Todd, mom, my brother and me, I apologized to mom for what happened in her brand new car, but I was so Grateful for making this a most memorable birthday experience! It still shines in memory, despite the way things were fucked up all around the event, that show, seeing Queen, was a profound show to me and something Todd and I talked about for the rest of his life. Todd admitted to me, he didn’t really like Queen that much and he was just humoring me but after we went to the show, he agreed…Queen was indeed one of The Great Bands of Rock and Roll!





Queen in Concert, circa 1978...


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

This true story was suggested to me by one of my regular reader/friends who is also a very big fan of Queen and as I considered the story, while remembering how it all went down, I found a moment of clarity for myself in the now. In the year after that birthday, my life radically changed when Todd died in a carbon monoxide accident the next summer and I started to exhibit serious symptoms of my BiPolar disorder. Although I continued see many rock and roll shows after that, that Queen show on my 17th birthday was probably the last one I went to feeling innocent, hopeful and untainted by life’s most horrible pains. I would never see another concert without both comparing it to that magical Queen show and then thinking about if Todd would have enjoyed the show? The other people who went to the show also had tragic experiences; Amy (Todd’s girlfriend) committed suicide a year after Todd died and Stephanie (my girlfriend of the month) moved on to get pregnant and then marry a wife beating redneck when she was only 19 years old. Gino and I lost contact after Todd’s death but reconnected in The Internet Age and have since renewed our friendship. He’s a successful guitar manufacture/dealer in Florida now, still plays music for fun (like me) and is still very friendly and funny. Gino’s sister, Donna, ended up having a happy, normal life with one husband and three kids in Arizona but unfortunately she lost a battle with cancer in 2008. My brother grew up, had a successful career in advertising then a second successful career as a stay-at-home dad for 10 years before breaking up with his wife and starting a freelance career in the arts. Mom too, she has a good life and bless her sweet heart, she’s happily married and retired in Arkansas…she too still remembers this show. I told her about this article when I called her on Sunday evening, something I make a point of doing. She laughed and declared herself insane and that if I asked her today she would say no fucking way!




www.dphilipchalmers.net

So there you have it, although this story is not talked about in such detail in my book, “My BiPolar Reality; How Life Goes On…” I do refer to it and most of the characters in this blog post are indeed in the pages of my book because they peopled my life…but the real message in this post, what defined it for me is the notion that despite all odds, we made it to that Queen concert because it was the end of our innocence, in a way, it was the last show before everything in life seemed to be touch by sadness. That means a lot to me, so I’m Grateful for this suggestion and I do indeed hope you enjoyed the story! In the weeks ahead, as this year ends and the holidaze come upon us, I am not going to be out promoting the book as much so I plan to spend more time here, with my on-line communities. I’m hoping that some of you may be inclined to pick up a copy or two of my book, it’s a great Christmas gift and if you order from my website, you get it autographed and some other free shit…but even if you don’t buy a copy, please don’t hesitate to engage me in conversations, dialogues and whatever…I’m around, you know my name, look up the number!






Selfie, 12.13.14





Thanks for reading, take care and be well!

Peace,

d’Philip